In exactly six month K and I will travel to Columbus, Ohio to kick off the wedding celebration for my brother & his fiancee. In six months we will run through the whole ceremony and laugh about tripping down the aisle or crying through the vows and toast to the lovebirds at their rehearsal dinner. And then the next day I will watch my baby brother become a “husband.” (Excuse me for just a moment… my eyes started sweating suddenly.)
Before I got married I had 0 sisters. Right now I’m sitting pretty with two beautiful women to call “sis” thanks to K’s side of the family. In July my family gets to add to our mix. My parents get to become “in-laws” again and I will gained another sibling. For 21 years it was me and Fred so all these “new” siblings are quite a change.
But this wedding will be a little different for all of us. Like I said… it’s always been me and Fred. Always. In 2013 I changed that by marrying Kyle but nothing changed for Fred (except the addition of a brother). He was still just my brother. My brother. I didn’t have to share him. But in July my brother- my mom and dad’s son… their last unwed child- is going to become a husband. And a son-in-law. And a brother-in-law. And two families are going to be interconnected by one young couple. And it’s just a little weird for this big sister. But weird in a good way.
And here’s what my newest sister needs to know:
For a long time I didn’t know your name. I didn’t know what you would look like or what your interests would be. I didn’t know if you were a dog person or a cat person. I had no idea if you enjoyed movies or reading or art or theater.
But then my baby brother met you and fell very, very hard for you. And I finally met you! And now I know your name. And thank the heavens above: You are, in fact, a dog person ❤︎
For whatever reason you’ve decided to marry my quirky brother. He’s an odd bird, but that’s what makes him so darn special. He puts all his energy into his projects and focuses on something until it’s done. His Halloween costumes, jack-o-lantern carvings, engineering projects, and artistic designs alway come out just as he imagined. It’s a little annoying how good he is at creating his vision.
My brother is much more sensitive than I am. He has my dad’s passion and my mom’s reactions. I do, too, but my personality comes across differently. He’s quick to anger but also quick to cool off… He’s a very forgiving soul. That’s pretty rare.
My brother has always been the dependent one. I mean that in a good, trusting way. He wants to help others and isn’t afraid to ask for help. When I was a kid I avoided hugs and flinched at the touch of others, but my brother would crawl on my mom’s lap and cuddle for hours. He’s loyal and trusting and dedicated- you really can’t ask for much more in a husband.
My brother is an amazing friend. He doesn’t shy away from uncomfortable situations and he’s bound and determined to do the right thing. I don’t need to tell you that he’s a God loving/fearing/worshiping man. You know that and you help him cultivate that love. He’s very, very fortunate to have a woman to grow with spiritually.
When we were kids we weren’t allowed to bring friends on vacation because we “had each other to play with and hang out with.” Some of my parents’ rules were stupid (like leaving your cell phone on the mantel… psht), but that was a good one. My brother was my best friend growing up and he still is. I can’t imagine my childhood without Fred.
And now he’s going to marry you and you’re going to marry him. So here’s some unsolicited advice from the older sibling who’s married:
Make conscious choices. Choose to say gentle words. Choose your tone. Choose communication and choose to turn the TV off sometimes and entertain one another with stories and jokes and recaps from your day. Choose to put God first and choose prayer. Choose together which family to visit and which vacations to take. Choose a dog together and choose which battles to fight and which flames to extinguish. And above all else, choose one other. Always, always, always choose one another. Often you will be faced with that choice; choose each other.
I love my little brother and I’m very, very happy to know you do, too. Savor every single moment of life together. I’m so happy our family is growing with you!
-Your newest sister! ❤︎