Chats with K

Before we dive into our conversations… today is my parents’ 30th wedding anniversary! ❤︎ So I want to devote a paragraph or two to them real quick…

My parents are wonderful odd balls. (My brother and I got it honest.) My teenage years gave them (esp. my mom) a run for their money sanity, but as an adult I spend so much time with them. Mom and I still bicker sometimes & Dad and I shout over politics, but through the years I’ve learned so much about marriage and life from them. Honesty, forgiveness, understanding, and humor are the key ingredients to a happy relationship.

Bonnie & Clyde trying to steal the getaway-car thunder four years ago at our wedding…

So Happy THIRTIETH Anniversary to the animal-loving, garden-growing, child-raising, country-living parents that I’ve grown up loving and admiring. Fred and I are better people and better spouses because of you two. Thanks for everything! ❤︎

And now… a collection of random, weird conversations with the husband… 🙂

Me: You know… when I’m calm, I imagine these smooth-yet-wavy purple lines running through my body, carrying my calm energy to every limb. But right now I’m filled with these spiky hot pink and orange wiry balls just pulsing all throughout my insides because I’m so freakin’ anxious about all the things we have going on!
K: …your head is one f*cked up place to be, isn’t it?

In preparation for my garage sale…
Me: I’m pretty much done collecting stuff, but I wanted to ask if you had any shoes you wanted to get rid of.
K: No.
Me: …what about the ones in your office that you said you didn’t want.
*K glares at me.*
Me: So what you mean is ‘Yes, but I don’t want to take the time to look and weed them out.’

We’d been waiting almost two weeks for an important call…
K: Alright, Miss Cleo. You think they’re going to call today? What’re they going to say?
Me: Oh, Kyle. I don’t have that kind of foresight. I can’t predict when or how you’ll die, but I can predict that you’ll die.
K: Not me. I’ve hidden horcruxes everywhere. You’ll never get rid of me.
Me: …I so appreciate that reference, honey. But also I know two of them are the corvette and Lylee.

K was letting the dogs out and called me to the back patio.
K: This is either the biggest maggot I’ve ever seen or it’s the fattest, shortest worm.
Me: That’s a slug, dear.

29 Comments Add yours

  1. chelseajacobs says:

    I couldn’t even get past the first one without laughing…that is 100% something I would say haha

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    1. Louise says:

      He was so disturbed after I explained all that… hahaha. Oh well- he knew what he married 😉

      Like

  2. oh my gosh that first one!!! Amelia has a book that describes feelings the way you just did….https://www.amazon.com/My-Heart-Feelings-Growing-Hearts/dp/1419713108 you should probably get it.

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    1. Louise says:

      That book sounds perfect. And when we have kids I can teach them to explain things the same way and we can really outnumber Kyle 😀 Hahaha!

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  3. LOL! I always love these posts. But first, Happy Anniversary to your parents. 30 years together is awesome! And I certainly appreciate K’s horcrux reference because Harry Potter for life! And I hope when you finally got the call, it was the response you wanted.

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    1. Louise says:

      Thank you!
      Every once in a while he references HP and my heart just swells 🙂 The call eventually came in and it was NOT what we wanted, but sometimes that’s just life *shrug* Thank you, though!

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  4. Thanks for the morning sass while I eat my breakfast lol. Also, 10 points to Kyle for the HP reference.

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    1. Louise says:

      Haha, no problem! And I agree 😀

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  5. Julie Hood says:

    HAHA slug….these are all so great and happy anniversary to your parents!

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    1. Louise says:

      In his defense, it was a very pale slug. I did a double-take before identifying it. Lol. Thank you!!

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  6. Rebecca Jo says:

    I just love you two solely on the Harry Potter horcrux conversation ❤

    Happy Anniversary to your parents. I love long love stories

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    1. Louise says:

      Haha! He’s not as big of a Potterhead as I am, but he indulges me 🙂 Thank you!

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  7. SMD says:

    Happy anniversary to your parents!

    I would die over the last conversation period. All of those things…not my friends.

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    1. Louise says:

      Thanks!
      I’m not a big fan of most bugs- the exceptions are honey bees, earthworms, and lightning bugs. Everything else is EW.

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  8. Laura says:

    Haha I am cracking up. These are hilarious. The slug one was the best.

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    1. Louise says:

      😀 Thanks! Haha!

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  9. Rachel G says:

    Happy anniversary to your parents!! Mine have just a couple years till their 30th but we’re already thinking it’ll be time to do something pretty epic. I moved into the same apartment complex as my parents two years ago so you could say we get along with them pretty well. 🙂

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  10. Stephanie says:

    That’s a slug, dear LOL I probably wouldn’t know a slug either, to be fair!

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    1. Louise says:

      Hahaha! We were actually sitting at the table eating dinner when he went to let them out. So he called me away from my dinner to show me the bug. Lol

      Like

  11. Aw, how sweet! Happy anniversary to your parents! Mine just celebrated 31.

    Oh my gosh, Jerry is the same. Whenever I’m prepping stuff to donate to the Goodwill, he says he has no clothes to get rid of. Until I start pulling them out and asking. He just doesn’t want to do that part lol.

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    1. Louise says:

      I love that! Happy Anniversary to them, too!

      Before a garage sale or during a clothing purge I lay everything out that I haven’t seen him touch in +6 months and I give him the opportunity to “save” a few things before I pack the rest away. Hahaha!

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  12. LOL, The Horcrux one is my fave.

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    1. Louise says:

      He’s a clever little thing sometimes 😉 haha!

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  13. LOL – these are great. I have started working on a few for KC. I used to forget to write it down, but I think I am getting close lately! 🙂 hehheh this cracks me up. Horcruxes. 😛 XO – Alexandra

    Simply Alexandra: My Favorite Things

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    1. Louise says:

      There are so many that go unrecorded. It makes me sad sometimes, lol! I can’t wait to read ones from KC someday soon!! 😀

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  14. Happy Anniversary to your parents! Conversations like those are exactly why I love marriage so much. They have to love you even when you think crazy stuff out loud, haha.

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    1. Louise says:

      Thank you! And yes! Haha! I said something weird the other day and he was like, “What the heck is wrong with you??” I was just like, hey man, you married me! Haha!

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  15. oh my goodness we are sooo the same with feeling and seeing colors in times of calm and panic! my calm is always a peaceful blue and my anxious is red and sparks and yellow sometimes!

    also – ravery is SO the same with saying ‘no’ to thinks because he’s too lazy to deal with it. haha

    Like

    1. Louise says:

      K is 100% not in tune with himself. Lol. My self-evaluations always throw him off. Hahaha.
      As wives we are SO dang good at deciphering their “no”s to meaning something totally different. Ha!

      Like

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