Wear the D@mn Shorts

This is a tale of self-confidence…

Last weekend we’d planned to spend some time with friends lakeside. The Friday before the trip I started brainstorming outfit ideas. I was thinking my cute swimsuit paired with my cut off high-waisted shorts.

‘But your thighs are so flabby and chunky. That’ll look terrible- all that cellulite and the scars. You should pick a different pair of shorts,’ I thought to myself.

Let’s pause my story and insert that I try very, very hard to encourage others to treat themselves kindly. It makes me mad when my mom nitpicks about herself or when my 10 year old cousin complains about her “fat” or when my friends are getting down on themselves.

“You aren’t fat, you have fat. Everyone does. It’s why you’re alive.”

“Don’t you dare talk badly about your arms/leg/tummy! That’s how you lift groceries or get from A to B or nourish your body!”

“You look great today! And who’s so important that you’d take their opinion over mine?!” 😉

Those are a few of my go-tos when it comes to encouragement.

But for whatever reason, that Friday afternoon I was hating my husky, pale, chicken-pox-scarred thighs. I’d like to say it was a fleeting thought, this discouraging self-talk, but it browbeat me into 30 minutes of outfit changes.

It’s funny… The internet is notorious for highlighting people’s “perfect lives.” That said, some of the most body-positive, encouraging, beautiful-inside-and-out people push their perfectly imperfect & totally embracing messages via social media (looking at you Lindsay, Aubrey, Chelsea, Dana, Christina). And I’m am 100% on board with that.

And yet I fall victim to my “zitty face” or “flabby tummy” or “chunky thighs.”

I’m usually extremely comfortable in my skin. My body is relatively healthy. I was given working limbs and organs. I am able to care for myself and others. Overall, I got very lucky with the skin I’m in. But we all have moments of weakness.

Fortunately, our moments of weakness happen at different times. When I’m feeling poorly, someone else is sending out positive vibes meant for me. So when you’re feeling badly, just know that someone is sending out those positive vibes for you, too. (Might I suggest any and all of those ladies up there! ☝️ )

I don’t think anyone is always positive and encouraging, but someone somewhere is always sending out some good vibes. So go seek it- it’s 100% meant for you. Someone loves you. They love your wide hips or your small shoulders or your pointed ears. Whatever features make you cringe in the mirror, I guarantee someone thinks nothing of it and loves you completely. And you should, too.

What I’m trying to say is: wear the damn cutoff shorts, my friends. ☀️

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14 thoughts on “Wear the D@mn Shorts

  1. Love this! I was thinking about something similar last night – I was telling a friend that she’s a good person and has value and not to let people treat her badly. But then I have this inner voice constantly telling me what a bad mother I am, and that I’m not contributing enough to our family, and that I’m just not good enough. I know it’s not true, but it’s so hard to shake it off!

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  2. Love this so much! I do that too. Where I am very supportive, encouraging to others to look past whatever apparent flaw has them momentarily hung-up but struggle to do that with myself. I will nitpick and moan and complain and put myself down, even though I know better. But it’s always harder when it’s yourself. Wear the damn shorts. Be proud of imperfections because they are what make us unique. And like Kathy said, a person who is confident in themselves and love themselves is always the most beautiful person in the room. I’m not there yet but I’m working towards it.

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  3. I went a whole decade not wearing shorts. Seriously. Ridiculous. I’m impressed that you are wise enough to identify the damaging, hurtful self-talk and re-direct yourself into sharing a positive message!

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  4. I so love this post.
    I had the inner fight when I was at camp with 400 middle schoolers & about 100 leaders – which are all about in their 20’s… so when I thought about getting a bathing suit & doing pool or lake activities, I just cringed. I was like, “I’m not going to do it”… but then I thought, SCREW THAT. I’m here for the fun & more importantly, I wanted to show the younger girls that confidence is the key to anything – so I put on my bathing suit, didnt even comment on how I felt inside & I had the most fun in all the things I had to wear a bathing suit in. & so glad I did it – there were a few heavier girls there too &I just loved seeing them with their own confidence next to their ‘skinny & thin’ friends… in the end, no one is going to remember what bathing suit anyone had on… but we’re going to remember the memories made. All that matters.

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  5. it’s like you wrote this for me. i’m struggling lately because i want to wear shorts and they literally don’t fit. i could buy bigger ones, but i’m pear shaped, so if they fit my thighs/butt/hips, they are too big on my waist, and if they fit my waist.. well i wouldn’t know because i can’t get them past all the other things lol. i’m like you though, so so so SO positive about everyone else and about the general ‘love yourself and be kind to yourself’ outlook but i definitely fall victim to it sometimes. so i just shake it off and grab my workout shorts because hey elastic waistband. i see you and i love you. haha.

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  6. I am so there with you. I am the first to tell other people not to tear themselves apart, and yet I rarely take my own advise. But here I am telling you to wear the damn shorts, girl!!!!! And wear them proud!

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