I know way back in the day pregnant women smoked and drank, ate whatever they wanted, and did all the things. Luckies…
Don’t get me wrong- I appreciate that research and science have found new ways to be responsible and healthy during pregnancy, but dammit I miss a lot of stuff right now.
Sleeping on my stomach.
Cold cut turkey sandwiches.
Wine. And cocktails. A mimosa sounds like heaven.
14 espresso drinks a day or unlimited coffee. (I still drink a cup a day.)
CAESAR SALAD. Lord help me. I want one from Texas Roadhouse so badly.
Lifting things without someone going, “Should you be lifting that?” It’s very sweet, but hush.
People Strangers not trying to caress my abdomen when they walk by. I’ve been strict but I’m willing to lighten up with family now that there’s a bump and it’s not just fluffy fat.
People not looking between my stomach and my eyes when talking to me. Like, I see you looking! Just look if you’re going to look. Lol
Leaving the house and not using the bathroom every place I go.
Tucking my shirt into high waisted pants.
…high waisted pants in general.
Not groaning when I roll off the couch/bed.
Reaching my feet to tie my shoes/put on socks. I can still touch my toes, but the whole getting dressed process is harder.
Not feeling full all. the. damn. time. I think my stomach now lives inside my kidneys underneath my lungs. And the kid beats up that cluster of organs often.
I know I’m complaining, but it’s all tongue in cheek. I’ve had some very nice moments:
A flight attended handed me my own liter of water when I boarded the plane and said, “Gotta stay hydrated. I remember those days!”
A bartender gave me free ice cream because I couldn’t have a cold beer with the other people in our group.
I’ve heard, “You look so good!” more times than I can count. And I don’t even care if they’re just being nice- it’s lovely to hear. We should say that to all women all the time.
People have randomly sent
me her gifts and getting happy mail unexpectedly like that is the best thing ever.
Honestly, I’m just being a baby. Yes the heartburn is rough and it’s getting harder to move around, but it’s all good.
(Seriously, though. I will have a turkey sandwich waiting for me at the end of labor & delivery. It’s one of K’s assigned duties as DAD.)