My Favorite Person

Today is K’s 32nd birthday. We took this week off and away from work. We’re attempting to relax and forget about the craziness of this time of year.

I’m willing to skip book day for K’s BIG 3-2 bday, so check in tomorrow for a special Wednesday book post! (I met K when he was 18. HOW THE EFF IS HE 32!?)

I’m keeping it short and sweet. Here are a few of my favorite things about Kyle:

  • his love of dogs
  • his generous, giving heart
    (he seems like a tough cookie, but he’s so giving)
  • he’s a natural with babies and kids
  • he & my dad hang out all the time
  • his car knowledge
  • his vehicle skills- he can drive a truck & trailer, a manual vehicle, a semi truck, a motorcycle, etc.
  • the way he talks about me when I’m around AND when I’m not
  • his subtle protectiveness of me & my feeling
  • he is a feminist and doesn’t ever question my (or any other female’s) ability to do something because I’m a woman
  • I have never seen him show off (or “flex” as the kids say) to prove his manliness
  • he understands that after a social weekend I just need to be alone
  • he knows when to tease me and when to lift me up
  • his love of history and learning (despite not being a reader)
  • his grilling
  • his nose
  • he’s loyal to the core
  • he is honest and doesn’t resort to flattery or brown nosing to gain someone’s approval
  • actually, he just doesn’t give a damn about seeking approval
  • he listens and pays attention
  • he works hard to keep our marriage fair and healthy and top priority
  • his business mindset and professional drive
  • his acceptance of failure and mistakes- his own & others
  • his promptness
  • he is kind, even when he doesn’t want to be
  • he goes out of his way to make me feel loved and happy

Alright- that’s enough. Happy Birthday, Kyle. I love you today & every day.

 

 

I More Than Love You

Last week we kicked off our trade show/travel season at work. It’s a six month chunk with roughly nine potential shows or competitions spread throughout. (We also do a trip in August.) I spend a great deal of time with my husband regardless, but traveling together pushes us physically closer for longer stretches of time in higher stress situations.

So natural I got to thinking about our marriage.

I really enjoy my husband. I think he’s funny and witty and smarter than even he knows (and, trust me, he thinks plenty highly of himself). He’s sarcastic and not romantic (in the traditional sense) and not nearly as sentimental as me, though, so I don’t always tell him how gosh damn wonderful I think he is.

But I realized this weekend- five years post wedding & 11 years after agreeing that we should, in fact, date- that I ought to tell him sometimes.

I drank a few adult beverages one night on our recent business trip and *accidentally* gushed to a mutual friend about how our business’ success is 50% luck and 50% my husband (plus all the people we’ve had cycle in and out over the last 6 years, self included). I told them that K has a large ego so I’d never tell him this, but he’s so damn smart- socially & logically. He has no business or engineering education but he’s really done something incredible with the company.

The applicable part of this story is that I have these thoughts about K but I don’t ever tell him. Maybe our marriage is rare, but I doubt it. Chances are there are some “obvious” things you admire about your spouse (or grandma or brother or best friend) that you don’t tell them because… well… why would or should you?

So I’m encouraging you to tell them. It makes your marriage or relationship or work experience or neighborhood that much better. People like being told that the things they’re doing and saying every single day are being noticed and admired and appreciated.

They say to tell loved ones that you love them. Or to say thank you more often. Or to spend quality time with people. But I also encourage you to notice what you admire or appreciate about someone & tell them.

Chats with K

Last Saturday marked 11 years with Kyle. The original “chat with K” occurred on that day in 2007.

Me: Guess what? My parents finally decided it’d be ok* if we dated!
K: Cool!
Me: …so…?
K: Well, I guess we’re dating now.

Always the romantic, friends.
*There’s an age gap between us (and I was 17) so we wanted our relationship to be ok with my parents before we called a square a square.

Alright, now our more recent conversations…

I have a lot of these today…


K: If we have a kid that wants to race go-karts I could get behind that. I’d sponsor the shit out of their car.
Me: The fact that you just said “kid” and not “son” is pretty much why I married you.


Me: If you were going to throw me a surprise party what would I want?
K: Quidditch.
Me: I… uh… yeah, actually. But that’s not what I was going to say.
K: That’s because I know you better than you know you.


Me: What time are we starting this landscaping project on Saturday?
K: Your dad and I will probably go get the stone around 6am.
Me: …so I should probably reschedule my 8am massage?
K: *glares* I’d say use your best judgement.


K kills a flying against the counter with his hand and looks at me proudly.
Me: You’re gonna clean that up, right?
K calls Lylee over and swipes the dead fly onto the floor. Dog eats it.
K: I did it.


While driving in the car…
K: Pick some music to jam out to. You always want to talk. I don’t get to jam with you in the car anymore.
Me: I would LOVE to not talk to you and jam out, thanks.


Me: I think you think I’m mean to you.
K *grumbles*
Me: I’m not mean to you. I just treat you like an adult. Don’t you want to be treated like an adult?
K: *sneezes all over the seat next to him without covering his mouth and grins* Does that answer your question?


After bitching at him for leaving clothes all over the kitchen…
Me: Kyle, I work hard all day and then come straight home and clean. You come straight home and mess.
K: But what would you clean if I didn’t mess? We’re like two peas.
Me: It’s about to get murderous up in this pod.


Me: Make me an egg.
K just looks at me.
Me: Enzo, go make me an egg.
K: You’ve eaten several time today.
Me: It’s called “healthy”, Kyle. It improves your metabolism.
K: …one of those times it was Doritos.

That’ll do it for this round of chats.

Date Ideas for Couples Who Don’t “Date”

I’m going to make a confession that will shock and horrifying marriage bloggers.

We don’t go on scheduled weekly or bi-weekly or monthly date nights.

Don’t get me wrong- we go on dates. They’re just not regular or scheduled. Our relationship doesn’t work that like. We’re both workaholics (who work with each other) and it’s healthier for us to veg at home (sometimes together and sometimes apart) instead of heading out on the town. I’m an introvert and K is an introverted extrovert so we alter our life and relationship to make ourselves happiest.

Ok, enough explaining. When we DO go out on dates, they tend to be a little bigger and/or planned out than what a weekly date night might entail. If your “dating style” is similar to ours, here are a few of our favorite things to do together:

An evening concert.
We love going to concerts together. We’ve been doing it since the very first month we started dating. When we were younger we’d show up to the concert venue, rock out, and then pig out on fast food or gas station food on our drive home. Now we like to go out to dinner first, then attend the concert (and then come home and crash like old people, lol).

A trip to the local creamery.
We live about 0.25 miles from the town’s BEST creamery. In addition to yummy ice cream, we both love their homemade coney sauce. On beautiful evenings when we don’t feel like cooking we climb into the convertible and cruise over there for dinner together.

Early morning breakfast dates.
I think one of my hands down favorite things to do with K is to wake up semi-early on a Saturday or Sunday and get breakfast at a local diner while the world is still waking up. There are lots of places near us but our favorite is a cute one a few towns over. With maybe 12 tables inside, everyone knows everyone. We’re strangers in that town, but they’re so friendly and it’s fun to watch them greet one another and catch up as they come inside for breakfast.

Walking around car shows.
I married a car enthusiast. We’ve spent many afternoons slowly walking through car shows, admiring the vintage rides of yesteryear. Truth be told, I’ve actually learned a lot about cars from K while walking around these shows. My dad, brother, and grandfathers are all car lovers, too. I guess it’s in my blood 😉 Perusing car lots and open houses are also a fun way to spend the afternoon. For us anyway.

A festival lunch date.
We don’t really care for crowds. Additionally, in a small town like ours, when you immerse yourself in a crowd you’re bound to know a handful of people- some you like and some you don’t. We’ve found that by going on weekday lunch dates to street fests and fairs, we avoid crowds and lines and small talk with people we haven’t seen since high school. AND we get the benefit of fresh lemonade and vinegar-soaked fries 😀

I think it’s adorable and cute and #relationshipgoals when couples plan out weekly quality time. I really do. It’s just not how we operate 🙂 All kinds of kinds. These occasional outings work well for us and keep us happy and connected. Next time you’re looking for something to do with you s/o, try one of these!

What kind of date activities do you and yours like to do?

Dear Meghan

I debated writing this post. I imagine we’re all tired of royal wedding talk, but I kind of love the royals (and this is my blog) so I felt an urge to write about the wedding of the year… Also, I’ve seen and heard a lot of hate talk direct at and about Meghan Markle (now Her Royal Highness, the Duchess of Sussex). If people can use their platform to say nasty things about a total stranger that they’ve never met then I can absolutely use my platform to say lovely things.

Dear Meghan,

Congratulations! I hope last Saturday was one of the happiest days of your life (and not too terribly stressful). It’s hard to remember where to stand and when to speak in a normal wedding, let alone one with the queen in attendance and a prince as the groom! I thought you were amazing and stunning and so damn beautiful- pretty much the way you appear in every public outing, actually.

I felt the urge to write because I’ve seen people say some pretty terrible things about you or Harry or you and Harry. I can’t quite understand that. I’ve seen the word “trash” thrown around quite a bit and I’m trying to figure that out. If it’s your beautiful bi-racial ancestry that they’re so wrapped up in then I think we can chalk them up to racist garbage humans. If it’s because you’re an intelligent, take-no-sh*t, self-made woman (if I had a drink for every time I heard THAT phrase on Saturday… I’d still be drunk), then I think we can probably also toss them and their opinions in the garbage.

Personally, I find you lovely. I like your passion and your outspokenness. I love your ripped jeans and messy bun style. I love the way you and Harry look at one another. If Harry is the people’s prince then you are most certainly the world’s princess. (I know, I know… technically you’re not a princess.) All that to say, you being you under all the pressure is incredible.

I think I should add that I love your sister-in-law, too. The Duchess of Cambridge is a badass in her own right and I love that you four (I’m including the boys, of course) seem to be such jolly mates. I don’t compare you to one another and I find that you’re both incredible role models. (If I have kids I hope that they see you all and your charity and selflessness as traits they’d like to embody.)

I’m confident that marriage won’t make you shy away from activism. You’re a blessing to that royal family and it was so fun (and historic!) to see a great family become even greater. It will be so much fun to watch you change the world. I love that you already have.

So anyway… thank you for being a GOOD American featured in the news for once. Our country needs a few shining lights and I think you are one. Also, if princesses still have ladies-in-waiting and you need one send me an email. Just saying. Until then, enjoy marriage! It’s fun and exciting and so rewarding!

Let me know about the l-i-w thing. Talk to ya soon.

-Aud

P.S. I love that you have a rescue dog. I am also available for the role of royal rescue dogs’ care taker. Just FYI.

I love the princes. I think William and Kate are stunning. I woke up early when I was in college to watch the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge tie the knot. I think that Harry, while a (lovable) trouble maker for a bit, is such a wonderful soul. And Meghan… don’t even get me started. The royal family is gaining a badass and I hope they don’t take that for granted.

I really did see a ton of negative things out there about the newest royal (and heard a few in person that I promptly shot down). That kind of racism/sexism/classism annoys the crap out of me. So here I am, attempting to put some positivity into the world 😉

So tell me, did you watch the royal wedding? Did you make it past the procession without crying? I did not… LOL