My Life Is Over

Have you noticed that when you announce a major life change there are always a few people that let you know what you’re giving up. Mixed in with the “Congratulations” and “I’m so happy for you” are the “I guess you won’t be doing xyz anymore” and “Looks like it’s time to give up blah blah blah.”

I think it happens most with marriage and babies, although I’ve heard it said about new relationships, job shifts, and house buying, too.

“Got that old ball and chain? Looks like you won’t be at guys’ poker night anymore.”

“You’re expecting? Say goodbye to those frequent flyer miles!”

“New house? Yikes. Goodbye money and Friday nights on the town.”

Two of my best friends live out of town and when I go see them, I usually stay the night. When I got married there were a few comments made about how I can’t do that anymore. Guess what I still do… We also vacation together, with and without our significant others.

When we announced our pregnancy, our corvette was suddenly under attack. “Time to sell the car, eh?” “Babies don’t fit in corvettes.” “Saying goodbye to fun toys is hard.”

We’re not selling our car. We’re also not going to stop traveling or working. And we’ll be keeping our dogs & continuing to allow them to sleep with us.

Our lives are not over.

These comments drive me nuts because I HATE being told what to do or what I can and cannot do. Don’t get me wrong, I know kids change things. The vette might get neglected next summer and I’ve already had to alter my travel for 2020, but when people talk about kids (or marriage or relationships or pet ownership) as a death sentence I just roll my eyes and rage.

I understand the need for humans to offer other humans advice when it comes to life changes, but the one liners about life being over or the fun times being a thing of the past need to go away. Quite honestly, it’s hard enough thinking about the future and planning for all the changes- the snide remarks about “missing out” aren’t helpful to anyone.

So if you’re one who makes these comments, cut it out. It’s not helpful at all. And if you’re on the receiving end, just know that it’s a load of bullsh*t- at least as far as marriage goes. I’ll report back on the childrearing. Regardless, the corvette is staying in the family.

Chats with K

Thank you for all the baby love, friends ❤️ You guys are seriously the greatest people I’ve never met 😊

Today I have a bunch of chats with K that I never got around to sharing!

Me: Shoot! Did we miss Jeopardy?
K: Nope. I’d say you’re about 70 years early.

I paused Dirt and got up to let the dogs out. K picked up my book (Daisy Jones) to mock me for reading 2 or 3 minute at a time when I can (like when he lets the dogs out).
Me: You’re so funny.
K *pauses because he’s actually reading a small part*: We’re watching a movie about sex and drugs and music… and you’re reading a book about sex and drugs and music.
Me: Yeah, it reminded me that I wanted to watch this movie.

*walks into K’s office* Me: Have you seen the news?
K: About the thing in France that’s on fire?
Me: “The thing in France“? THAT’S NOTRE DAME, KYLE!
He’s not really one for international landmarks.

Me: I figured cereal would help my heartburn because of the milk but I think the cereal part makes it worse.
K: Want me to take one for the team? I’ll eat the Fruity Pebbles and you can have the leftover mi- No, I don’t want to give up the best part.
Me: Literally any other cereal milk, Kyle. Not that gross crap.
K: The sugary cereal makes the best milk- Cinnamon Toast Crunch, Frosted Flakes, Cheerios.
Me: …Cheerios don’t have sugar.
K: Yes they do, when you eat them correctly.

Me: While we’re in Phoenix would you rather drive to the Grand Canyon for the day or take a train ride through the desert canyons?
K: Ehh… I’ve seen Back to the Future. I know how train rides through the desert go. Somewhere out there there’s a bridge that isn’t finished and I don’t want to come across it.
Me: …are you kidding me?

Me: How do I look?
K: Different…
Me: That’s not a compliment. “Different” and “bad” are not good answers.
K: You don’t look bad………. you just look like you stole your wardrobe from the cast of Little Women.
Me: Still. Not. A. Compliment.

Such a way with words, lol.

Six Years A Mrs.

Saturday is our sixth wedding anniversary. I say it every single year, but I don’t know how it’s been six years already. And I don’t know how it’s only been six years.

(C)Ryan Armbrust Sniper Photo LLC

We went on our first date 12 years ago. How anyone (other than my parents) puts up with me day in and day out for 12 years is beyond me.

Last year I wrote about K’s crows feet. They’re still there and I still love them. This year I’m going to be a little goofier and share with you all the dumb things we fight about- even after 12 years.

Whether or not nachos are an appropriate dinner.

Whether or not snacks in general are an appropriate dinner. (They are.)

Me refusing to learn people’s names and using my own nicknames.

Someone promising to pick up the dog poop in the backyard if we got a puppy (me). And now someone brings that up any time I make a promise he knows I won’t keep. (It’s been five years, dude. Geeeez.)

Why someone needs 100 pairs of shoes.

The cable. We still have it. And Netflix, Hulu, and Amazon Prime. I think we have a Swing account, too.

Someone’s overall behavior and language when playing video games (also me).

Halloween decorations.

Christmas decorations.

Pretty much any decorations that aren’t our “every day” decorations.

Real tree vs. fake tree. And white lights vs. color lights.
(Every year I win with a real tree & he wins with white lights.)

The amount of dog hair in my car.

“Let’s get a third dog.”
“For the hundredth time: NO.”
“I know. I was just kidding.”
“No you weren’t. And you need to pick up the dog poop in the yard.”

Backing into the garage and how close someone (me) gets to the workbench.

Bathroom counter space.

The habit of setting multiple morning alarms and ignoring them all.

Clothes that can’t find their way to the laundry room.

Which living room blanket belongs to who.

Appropriate conversation to have right before falling asleep.

Happy Anniversary to my shoe-hoarding, Halloween-loathing, blanket-hogging husband. I can’t wait to celebrate the next 80+ years with you ❤️

My Favorite Person

Today is K’s 32nd birthday. We took this week off and away from work. We’re attempting to relax and forget about the craziness of this time of year.

I’m willing to skip book day for K’s BIG 3-2 bday, so check in tomorrow for a special Wednesday book post! (I met K when he was 18. HOW THE EFF IS HE 32!?)

I’m keeping it short and sweet. Here are a few of my favorite things about Kyle:

  • his love of dogs
  • his generous, giving heart
    (he seems like a tough cookie, but he’s so giving)
  • he’s a natural with babies and kids
  • he & my dad hang out all the time
  • his car knowledge
  • his vehicle skills- he can drive a truck & trailer, a manual vehicle, a semi truck, a motorcycle, etc.
  • the way he talks about me when I’m around AND when I’m not
  • his subtle protectiveness of me & my feeling
  • he is a feminist and doesn’t ever question my (or any other female’s) ability to do something because I’m a woman
  • I have never seen him show off (or “flex” as the kids say) to prove his manliness
  • he understands that after a social weekend I just need to be alone
  • he knows when to tease me and when to lift me up
  • his love of history and learning (despite not being a reader)
  • his grilling
  • his nose
  • he’s loyal to the core
  • he is honest and doesn’t resort to flattery or brown nosing to gain someone’s approval
  • actually, he just doesn’t give a damn about seeking approval
  • he listens and pays attention
  • he works hard to keep our marriage fair and healthy and top priority
  • his business mindset and professional drive
  • his acceptance of failure and mistakes- his own & others
  • his promptness
  • he is kind, even when he doesn’t want to be
  • he goes out of his way to make me feel loved and happy

Alright- that’s enough. Happy Birthday, Kyle. I love you today & every day.

 

 

Relationships Tag | TBB Asks

I’m not planning to do these every month, but I am tired today and my brain can’t handle much. Plus, I love gushing about my circle of people. So today, in honor of Valentine’s Day I guess, I’m linking up with The Blended Blog for some relationship-related questions.

1 | Who is your oldest friend? How did you meet?
I have a friends from church & elementary school that I still talk to occasionally, but I met my oldest best friend in 5th grade. I was visiting her elementary school and ended up at her table and she was SO loud. We still laugh about my first impression of her 😉

2 | Tell us about your circle of support. Who are your people?
Obviously K is my person. I have three best friends and a handful of very very close friends. K and I are very close with most of our family. My brother and siblings-in-law are also in my close circle.

3 | How did you meet your partner?
We were both band nerds. We met when I was 15 but we didn’t start dating until after my 17th birthday.

4 | How is Valentine’s Day celebrated in your home?
It’s not. The last few years we’ve been on a business trip over the 14th. We typically go to dinner but we don’t put much effort into V-Day.

5 | What is your love language?
I know they can change, but last I checked it was Quality Time. This gets tricky because we work together, but I don’t typically see time in the office as “quality.” I think K is somewhere between Acts of Service & Words of Affirmation.

6 | Flowers or chocolate?
Flowers for sure. But books are even better.

7 | What is the most meaningful gift you have ever been given? 
Hmm. I’m not sure. My husband is incredible at getting personalized gifts for me. He once bought me a frame with original film clips from each HP movie. This past birthday he got me orchestra tickets to see HP and the PoA in concert. My best friend Erica gave us a custom Lylee ornament one year for Christmas and I love it with all my heart. Gifts based around HP or my dogs tend to warm my heart.

Feel free to answer all or some of these in the comments! I love hearing about how people met their s/o or how long you’ve been friends with your closest pals!