This Is A Rant About My Rights

I don’t post on Fridays but I’m pissed off.

I want to write about silly things and life updates and other fun things but I cannot get our country’s bullshit out of my head.

I have to write it out.

I posted this on my facebook this week:

“So like… are we going to believe victims of sexual assault now that they are being forced to carry the proof in their own wombs and birth their abuser’s offspring or… are we still going to argue that they were asking for it?

I seriously can’t with this f*cked up country right now. Do not gloss over these new laws. They are a direct assault on you and the women you love.”

You know what? Republicans, democrats, libertarians, and borderline socialist all liked it. You know why? Because these new effed up laws aren’t to protect childen- they’re to control women.

Laws that would benefit kids: School lunch health laws. Gun laws. Keeping kids out of freaking cages laws. Adequate funding for schools and teachers laws. Environmental laws. Stronger rape and abuse laws. Stronger animal abuse laws (because animal abusers WILL move on to humans). Health care laws. Affordable college laws. Welfare program laws. Homelessness laws. Hunger laws. Living condition and real estate laws. Medical laws that IMPROVE the care, services, and conditions of lower income facilities.

You want to work on and pass laws to help kids? Work on those ^^^

Laws that do not benefit kids: Forcing women to abstain from sex OR risk pregnancy. Forcing women to birth a human that they did not consent to making. Forcing doctors to withhold life saving and safe medical procedures from consenting women. Removing birth control as an option for employed women. Closing and decreasing funding to FREE & low cost clinics that assist with conception, pregnancy, birth, and other services.

Maybe you’re pro-life. I’m not going to argue with you on your beliefs. I will argue that these laws are NOT pro-life. They are anti-women. They are dangerous. They are being passed by men who do not understand how menstruation works, let along pregnancy. These states have stricter laws on the female body than they do on GUNS. Based solely on the service level digging I did, the numbers of abortions in the US have dropped over the years and gun violence has skyrocketed.

I’m not going after gun rights at this moment- promise– but as far as policies that need laws revamped go… My lovely female body ain’t it. You want to help me out? BELIEVE ME when I say someone assaulted/raped/underpaid/stalked/harassed/threatened me.

I have many things to say about this, but I need to stop and calm down because you get the idea. Guys… uneducated, stupid-as-stones men are making these laws. (I’ll admit there are some dumbshit women involved as well.) Men that don’t understand how tampons work or how ectopic pregnancy works or when an egg is even implanted in a woman’s uterus. For f*ck sake. This is NOT ok.

And as a side note, rapists can SUE their victims for custody rights in 31 states. What. the. hell.

So I agree that there are rape & healthcare laws that need revised. Forcing women to push out unwanted & unintended humans is NOT the humane or correct solution.

I’m turning my comments off because I don’t want to debate pro-life/pro-choice and I’m not changing my mind on this topic so I don’t need anyone to “at me”, as the kids say.  Feel free to share this, feel free to blacklist my blog, feel free to email me I guess. We still have all those rights as of now.

I’m not looking for validation in regards to this post- I’m just begging you to keep your eyes open, VOTE for decent and education humans, and get out there and fight the fight when you can. There is no Starbucks war on Christmas but there is a brewing, dangerous war on women.

-A

Catty Women & Aggressive Men

Recently I’ve noticed that it irritates the hell outta me when women say, “I don’t really like to hang around other women. All my friends are guys. I like to hang with the men.” I used to say these kinds of things myself. (I bet I still do sometimes…) And maybe you’re a female and a large percentage of your friends really are men- that’s not what actually irritates me. To me, this attitude/mentality, in and of itself, is what propels the societal norm of girl-on-girl sabotage/jealous/hate. Like it’s somehow better to strictly be friends with men. Like women are an inferior species to spend your time with.

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I have always had a mixed group of friends. I am comfortable talking with men and women about life, politics, relationships, cooking, homemaking, sports, etc. I love my guy friends dearly and it feels good to get a little muddy and be a little crude and kick back with a beer…… but sometimes I’m surrounded by women when I’m doing that! And the last time person I discussed cooking and cookbooks with was a male. I would be lost without both sexes.

I was in a small, fairly unfamiliar group last week that consisted of one man and three women (self-included). After the two women expressed their preference in male companionship because “women are just so catty”, the man asked why that was. As in, ‘Why are women (considered) catty?’

(I was picking up a serious feminist vibe from this dude & totally loving it.)

I think both women answered, “I don’t know. They just are.”

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The man then shared a story about how he was at a school reunion and conversing with 8 or 10 other men. He said the guys kept talking over one another and no one was really listen to what the other had to say- essential they were all competing for the spotlight. He’d found it unenjoyable and decided to bow out of the group. (I believe he was trying to make the point that sometimes ‘hanging with the dudes’ is unfulfilling and miserable.)

Instead of jumping into the conversation I just took mental notes and rehashed to whole think to K later that evening. #typical

So here’s the thing- I don’t believe that all women are catty. And I don’t think all men are aggressive. Do we have the ability to be catty/aggressive? Yes, absolutely. Do those traits define some people? You betcha. But I refuse to loop all women into the “catty” category. How screwy is it to avoid fraternizing with a certain gender/sex/race/religion because they’re all considered to be *(insert negative adjective here)*. I mean, I know it happens but to me that’s narrow-minded and wrong. But essentially, when we say, “I prefer guy-friends”, we’re saying that associating with women is beneath us and uninteresting. (WHICH IS CRAZY BECAUSE WE ARE WOMEN!)

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./rant

I don’t care what goes on below your waist- if you’re kind & we jive well & we have common interests, let’s talk! I don’t care about football or The Real Housewives of Antarctica, but let’s talk about NASCAR and politics and This Is Us. Girl or guy, let’s hang out. Let’s accept and lift up those that are different and the same as us. We’re not in competition, guys. We’re all in this together.

women1. . .

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Our System is Failing Our Citizens

I know I used my woman’s card last week, but I’m not going to let today go by without saying something here.

Today rapist Brock Turner is getting released from prison. He’s served 3 months of his 6 month sentence- he’s being released on “good behavior.” (I can only take that to mean he refrained from raping any women for the last three months.) If you’ve forgotten, Brock was convicted of three felony assault charges.

I’m livid. I believe pure liquid anger has replaced the blood in my veins and it’s pumping throughout my body. How do I send my future daughter(s) to college knowing that they have a 20% chance of being sexually assaulted? On top of that, if they are assaulted and they have the superhuman strength to press charges and their attacker is actually convicted, he might serve a sentence shorter than my daughter’s fall semester. I can’t even process this. What. The. F*ck.

HOW IS THIS OUR COUNTRY? How is anyone ok with this? I don’t mean you and me- I assume everyone here is freaking pissed. Nationwide, though, there are some people who think like Brock and his p.o.s. father and the judge. Those are the people that make me afraid to walk my dogs. Those are the people who stare at me or my cousins way too long in the grocery store. Those are the people that colleges tell you to use the buddy system to avoid. Because heaven forbid we do something about it- we just have to learn to live with them.

I don’t get it. I really don’t. I’m so sad that this is our reality. It makes me mad. It makes me carry pepper spray. I makes me want to carry a knife so I have a weapon of my own when I’m trapped in a breezeway with a potential rapist.

I was in a public building the other day and when I went to the bathroom there was a man cleaning the windows just outside the entrance to the women’s room. It was after hours and the hallway was empty but for us. The man wasn’t threatening, but I locked my stall and did my business as fast as I could because my mind played the scenario where that man could’ve come in the bathroom and trapped me. I had my pepper spray in hand until I was out of the bathroom. How is this our reality? How.

I try to keep thing happy and airy on Fridays, but today is a big kick in the ovaries for all women, daughter, mothers, fathers, sons, men, and anyone else who loves and respects humanity. Screw you, justice system. Something needs to change.

-Audrey

* No comments today because I’m hopeful we’re all pretty pissed and in agreeance. Also, I am aware that California has changed the laws on rape because of this case. I guess that’s the one thin faded silver grey lining in this situation.