I am a Woman & That’s OK

There are a million veins pumping blood and life into the issue of women’s rights but I’m going to try to touch on a small cube from the tip of the iceberg. Recent events such as the election and the Olympics have stirred the pot for me but the idea of it being “ok” that I’m a girl has always been something I’ve consciously thought about. a.k.a. Not apologizing for the fact that I’m female.

A few weeks ago I was having a conversation with a young girl and she was openly asking me question after question about getting her period for the first time. Essentially, I reassured her that when she gets her period it’s going to be 100% normal and it’s nothing she should be embarrassed about. Frankly, it took me a long time to realize that myself. I was the kid who hid my face while bra shopping or buried the pads underneath the cereal boxes at the grocery store. Being a kid was hard enough but adding all that girl stuff on top of it?? Mortifying.

BUT WHY?

Why the hell are girls taught to be embarrassed about being “on our period.” Um. Hello. Thanks to that 5 or 6 day step in our cycle the female body is cleansed and prepped FOR EVERYONE IN THE WORLD TO BE BORN. So, essentially, you’re welcome. (Yes, Tr*mp, we do have blood coming out of who knows where. Your mother did, too, so she was able to birth your pathetic ass.) #SorryImNotSorry, but I’m not embarrassed to menstruate. I’m not embarrassed to say it (or type it). And if my face breaks out or my mood shift a little bit during that week (because of hormones which everyone has) I don’t feel the need to apologize because why the hell would I? I don’t answer to anyone as far as what mood I’m allowed to be in.

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So there’s that. But let’s take it a step further.

Did you catch the Olympic drama? (No, not the phony robbery story.) The part where people made a big deal out of the media focusing on the men that medal-winning female athletes are married to/coached by or “owe it all to.” Here’s my two cents: Being married to a man or being coached by a man is fine and dandy. Giving them a nod is fine and dandy. Being defined as so-and-so’s wife/daughter/friend is not fine and dandy. SAY HER NAME. SAY HER SPORT. MAKE HER THE HEADLINE. We work for our accomplishments and we own our accomplishments. When you boil it down, these women won their medals because of who they are- not because of anyone else. This is the story/tweet I’m specifically talking about.

Heaven forbid a woman (especially a married one) have her own identity.

(Am I blowing it out of proportion? I don’t think so. Men typically don’t have to deal with this shit. Why do we?)

We don’t owe it to anyone. No one permits me to do anything. I have double X chromosomes and that’s fine. I’m equal. Use our freaking names.

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And another thing. A few days ago on the radio I was listening to a deejay rag on someone for taking his wife’s name. They he invited people to call in. A large majority said that women should just take the man’s name and get over it. (LOLOLOL seeing red right now.) <- I hope you felt the sass in that sentence.

I took my husband’s name. I didn’t have a problem with it. But if I’d wanted to keep mine then I’d have f-ing kept it. Because I have the right to do what I want with what I have. Get off our ovaries and you deal with it, DeeJay Dickhead.

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I specifically sought out Sloan Sabbith gifs because she’s a feminist goddess and I love her.

Do not treat me as less of a human. Do not pay me less. Do not talk down to me. Why is this a hard concept?

So there’s where I stand on the whole matter. Menstruation, ovulation, vagina, ovaries, breasts, etc. are not taboo words. Every single person on this earth came from a woman so have some respect and treat us like equals and say our f-ing name.

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Freddie Gets Married

I never talked much about my baby brother’s wedding so I figured I’d share a little bit today. Mostly it’s a photo dump with all untagged photos taken by Kylie Noelle Photography.

Fred & Christina got married on Saturday, July 23rd in Columbus, Ohio. They had a pretty large wedding party (8 and 8) but that made the set up and tear down a little easier. I’m sure it was different for other people, but I knew most of the groomsmen through Fred and I’d met all the bridesmaids during a shower or shopping trip, so the whole weekend was awesome. It’s way more enjoyable when you know the wedding group you’re a part of!

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*First Look* Christina’s girls included her two cousins, her sister, four of her closest friends, and me

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My handsome brother in the middle with the bow tie & my smokin’ hot husband to the left of him.

On Friday night all but one bridesmaid stayed at the hotel with Christina while the men crashed at Fred’s apartment. Our morning was laid back and included breakfast and primping. The music at the church didn’t start until 4:15pm so we had plenty of time to get (more) beautiful and excited!

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Christina is a fashion guru & she didn’t miss a single detail. We all picked out our own dresses and shoes but it came together perfectly under her direction & guidance. As avid F. Scott Fitzgerald fans and lovers of the Art Deco movement, Fred and Christina steered the style in a direction Daisy Buchanan herself would envy.

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The ceremony was spiritual and personal- a perfect balance that mirrors my brother & his wife’s relationship with one another and God. Apparently my family took bets as to if when I’d pass out in my heels. I’m happy to report I made it through the ceremony & out to the receiving line before I had to peel my shoes off. K was a sweaty mess in his heavy, burgundy tux… but damn he looked good😉

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As much as I love a good wedding ceremony, I’m alllll about that party reception! A few weeks before the wedding Fred asked if I’d give a toast. I don’t shy away from public speaking and I am so proud of my little brother so I accepted and spent days perfecting and practicing.

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My favorite picture from the whole day!

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The reception was at a theatre/ballroom, originally built in 1896. (The Columbus Athenaeum.) It was pretty awesome. The head table was on the stage and then was taken down to allow for a large dance floor. Since my best friend lives in Columbus I told her to pull on a dress and crash the wedding. There are no pictures, but she showed up after the meal and danced all night with me, then came out with us!

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Not so flattering for me, but I love that this pic has my four cousins in it.

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The party ended for most of the guests after the gorgeous sparkler exit… except my crazy parents and their friends and my in-laws; they took the party back to their hotel bar lobby with R. Kelly. And since we can’t turn down an invite from my dad we ended up at the hotel bar and then a late night taco restaurant. We finally hit the sack at 3:30am. (And then I drove Fred & Christina to the airport at 6am. WOOF.)

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So there’s the recap of our crazy, fun, tiring, sleepless weekend at my brother & sister (in-law)’s wedding. Of course there are millions of little stories and funny moments from the day, but it’d take months to blog all that. Suffice it to say, if Fred & Christina’s wedding is any indication of their marriage it’s going to be long, fun, full of love, and total unpredictable. But only the best things are🙂

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*Like I said, kudos to Kylie Noelle and her gorgeous photography skills!!

Favorites & Love

Hey. It’s Friday.
On Monday I posted a picture of my planner showcasing the totally free, unscheduled week I had ahead of me. It was nice and relaxing and I only forced myself to do a little housework. This weekend is open, too. And K’s home for once. My little simple heart is quite happy.

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So before I point you in the direction of other bloggers, let’s chill here for a minute.

Over the weekend DCI (Drum Corps International) had its finally competition in Indianapolis. K went, I stayed home. Here’s a super short clip from the 2016 Champs (The Bluecoats from Canton, OH!) that makes me laugh every time:

Maybe you saw this clip circulating the internet this season. That’s another drum corps.
Also, the cart she’s playing behind was built by my husband’s company🙂

Moving on.

This week I got a GoodReads notification that Shilpi Somaya Gowda liked my review of her book! So that was cool. (Are we friends on GoodReads? Because we should be!)

Last but not least, a cute little critter video for you:

And now some blogs for you🙂

  • Rebecca Jo hits the nail on the head when it comes to life-timelines!
  • Christine takes her first whack at bullet journaling and it’s pure perfection! When I finally pull the trigger I’m looking to her for organization & artistic inspiration!
  • My IRL good friend Aubrey started a blog! Remember I talked about her in this post? Now she’s a fitness goddess and cooking guru!
  • Emily’s advice on parenting one’s self is so, so good!

Fingers-crossed that today flies by and I’m on my front porch with a glass of wine before I know it! What’re you doing this weekend?

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The Drafts

Such an ambiguous title, right? I didn’t mean to make it so vague. I’m not talking about football or the army; I’m actually talking about the blog drafts that all of us have stored away in cyberspace. Well, I do at least.

I won’t lied. I was totally stuck on what to write about today. Nothing felt right. When that happens I usually consider skipping a day or even an entire week. (If my pattern isn’t obvious, I try to post Monday, Wednesday, Friday.) This week I looked through my draft posts, ended up cleaning them out and getting rid of 2/3, and then decided that the remaining few still didn’t fit for today.

And then I had a Jimmy Neutron brain blast. (Tell me I’m not the only one who remembers that stupid show…) Why not share all the drafts in my folder? Not in their full form, but just as a little preview for y’all of what’s to come (or not come, I guess… Depends on my mood).

I am a Woman & That’s OK
This is an angry feminist post. It almost went live today, but I held off. It’s not quite where I want it. Plus, it has some cursing (because it’s angry) and I know my family reads my blog so I need to edit it and/or just get past it. Ha. I’m sure something will happen soon enough that boils my blood and drives me to push “publish.”

Confession: I’m Obsessed with Planners
I ordered a planner and they gave me a coupon code for my blog readers! (Nope, I didn’t get the planner for free- I got a coupon code, too.) Once my planner arrives I will share pictures of how cute it is along with the code for you to get one if you want!
*The name of this post might change. I’m not loving it.

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What I Read… August 2016
This is pretty standard. I always have a running draft for books. So far I have two for August. I think I’ll end up with three total. Maybe four.

Blogger Love
Similar to the book post, I usually have a “blogger love” post saved somewhere for me to jot down the things I’ve read. This one is going live on Friday🙂

IMUO (In My Unpopular Opinion)…
I started a post documenting my ideas or opinions that I think aren’t widespread. I’m still collecting thoughts for this one. I think I have three or four so far.

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Helpful Tips to Calm an Anxious Dog
This post is 3/4 done and very important to me. Lylee is an anxious dog and it’s something we’ve been battling for years. I feel very passionately about dogs and their behavior/mental health/etc. so I will end up posting this eventually- once I get it perfected.

If something sounds good or dumb, let me know. I’m always looking for input! Also, I’m totally fine with people following/copying/borrowing my ideas🙂 Write what you want.

**Also, I shared my thoughts on body image + marriage with Elyse from Just Murrayed so check that out!

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My Favorite Household Appliances

Happy Monday, ladies and gents!
Did y’all have a nice weekend? I hosted a party on Friday, cleaned my house on Saturday, and helped a friend move on Sunday. K had a business trip so it was one of those wine-&-popcorn-in-bed + books kind of weekends. Totally not mad about it😉

Alright, on to today’s topic (which was slightly inspired by this post from Kristen).

Appliances

I don’t consider myself materialistic in the least. If our house caught fire the only non-living thing I’d try to save would be my stuffed bunny rabbit from childhood (appropriately named “Bunny”). That said, there are some things in our house that I really, really love.

(These are not affiliated links. I’m not tech-savvy enough to do that. I actually own & love this stuff!)
(If you use affiliated links in your posts I’m a-ok with that. I just don’t.)

Our Vacuum
We bought our vacuum with wedding giftcards/return credit from BB&B. When we walked in we thought we were going to walk out with a Dyson, but we ended up with a Shark because the sales woman told us that they constantly get returned Dysons but people love their Sharks. Yep, she was 100% right about loving the Shark vacuum. We have this one (I think) and it’s perfect for our daily dirt and dog hair collection. It’s my favorite cleaning tool!

Our Smart TV
We have two TVs in our house and the living room one is a smart TV. (I’m not sure of the brand and for the sake of this post, it doesn’t matter.) Most of the shows we watch together are on streaming platforms and it’s so amazing to access Netflix/Hulu/iHeartRadio/Amazon Prime with the touch of a button. I love it. In my opinion, if the choice should ever arise, a smart TV is worth it.

Our Blender
I am a firm believer in glass blenders. Not to be morbid and inappropriate, but I’ve told my grandma that I’d like to inherit her old-school glass blender “when she’s done with it.” (Ok, that’s totally morbid and inappropriate… I swear it’s a running joke now, though.)

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When we got married I registered for my own glass blender and we received it, and I’m soooo happy to have it. Honestly, things just taste better coming from a glass blender; it’s science.

Our Pots & Pans
We blindly registered for pots&pans before our wedding and by sheer luck we ended up with some absolute winners. I will recommend Calphalon to anyone that will listen. We received this set (I think) from some very generous guests. (Yes, I still remember who gifted us what.) They’re easy to clean and they’re durable. I also think they look classy- but that’s not what matters most, I guess. Honestly, I’m a mediocre cook and I let dirty dishes sit way too long, and these guys still hold up.

Things I’d like to own…

Shark Steam Mop
Our kitchen & dining room are hardwood. Someday we’d like to make the living room hardwood. Before that day come, I need a steam mop!

An electric griddle
For the love of everything, I have been asking for an electric griddle for yeaaars. Maybe it’s time to suck it up and buy myself one like an adult. Ha.

Food processor
I’m pretty sure owning a food processor is the only way to be a good chef. So I guess I need one. #logic

. . .

What household items do you love? Is there anything on your wishlist that you need😉 ?

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My People

First of all, thank you to everyone who commented on and shared Wednesday’s post. You all totally reinforced my point about the blogging community. I honestly believe every single one of you is great and I’m so happy to know/”know” you! ❤︎

Onward with the good vibes (and Chelsea‘s Tell Me Something Good link-up)!

Last weekend K and I attended his cousin’s wedding. His entire paternal family came from Texas, Tennessee, and parts of Ohio to celebrate the bride. I also knew the groom’s family because his sister and I were really close in grade school. He was also friends with my brother. Plus we all went to the same church. #SmallTownVibes. Needless to say, I knew a lot of people at the wedding.

There was one point during the reception when I was off to the side, standing between K and his sister. On either side of them were my in-laws, as well as K’s brother (and maybe his wife? I can’t remember). For whatever reason, in that exact moment, as the group of us stood there watching the party around us, I became aware of how ridiculously fortunate I am to call those people my people. I felt so special to casually stand among them- like there was never a time that I didn’t fit into that group.

*I wanted to insert a ridiculously adorable throwback photo K’s family here, but I didn’t know if they’d be ok with that. Just trust me on this one- it’s an adorable picture!*

I enjoy weddings. They give my an excuse to drink a lot bit and dance. I get to see friends and family that I don’t normally see. And more than anything else, I love watching two people exchange vows while I sit next to the guy that I promised to love +3 years ago. Additionally, sometimes a wedding joins two families. I know that’s not always the case- it depends on the family dynamic- but that was the effect of our wedding. I honestly don’t believe there’s anything that my mother- or father-in-law wouldn’t do for me. I love splitting a glass of wine with all my siblings-in-laws. My heart flips inside my chest when I see my dad and K hanging out. I loved that Fred & Christina asked both K and me to be a part of their wedding party. I honestly try very hard not to take for granted the family that I was born into and the family that I was blessed with through marriage. I know I’m lucky.

And standing among that tribe at the reception with K and his my family just made me feel it 10xs over. Whether it’s friends or family, I hope everyone has a group like that. Remember to be grateful for them.

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Tell Me Something Good Friday!

Blogging Has Made Me a Kinder Person

Before I launch into this I need to point out how weird the word “kinder” looks. Also, that’s the German word for “children” so that’s what I see when I read that title. All of this is 100% off topic. ALSO, I’m guest posting on Olya’s blog today! Go there next!!

I was commenting on a blog a few days ago and I thought to myself, “Wow, this is a really positive, encouraging comment. Go you!” (I swear I don’t have such confident, self-praising thoughts often.) The reason I took notice in my words and tone was because I haven’t always been an uplifting person. There’s always room for more improvement and I was never a Negative Nelly, but for a long time I was a Smug Sarcastic Susie.

I mean, I’m still sarcastic- that’s forever a part of me like my skin or eyelids or love for Harry Potter. But when you comment on a blog or share a post 97.8% of the time that author deserves genuine thoughts, praises, well-wishes, etc. There’s a time and a place for sarcasm (and I am always at that place during that time), but I have formed so many genuine, positive friendships with ladies via Blogland that I would have never sought out or nurtured like I do if it weren’t for this space here.

I’m now very conscious of what I say or type. I’ve never been an internet troll and as a human behind my blog I am fully aware that there are humans behind every blog. Most times I feel a sincere friendship with those humans. I don’t text any of those ladies (although if you’d like to be text-friends hit me up via email- I’m game!) but we SnapChat and comment on IG with one another, and daily things that remind me of certain bloggers compel me to tweet them thoughts and pictures throughout the week. I’ve also bounced blog and novel ideas off these ladies. I honestly didn’t think I’d find community here, but I have.

And it’s made me a kinder person. I use the words “jealous” and “hate” less often (just like I’d hoped!). Blogland has given me more respect for stay at home moms, working moms, part-time working moms, dog & cat moms, women with seen and unseen illnesses, travelers, writers, saleswomen, lawyers, realtors, public speakers, accountants, and everyone else living a life different than mine. I’m calmer. I’m more calculated. And I feel like I’m unique yet similar to others, all at the same time. My struggle is authentic and personal, but it’s relatable to others and it’s only temporary- whatever it is.

So thank you. Thank you to those who read my blog or allow me to read yours. Thank you to the folks who like or comment on my posts and the ones who quietly read my words and then click away to another blog. Thank you to the folks who show me support, kindness, and understanding through your keyboard. I hope I can pay you back 10xs over.

I look forward to growing and reading and improving with you :)  Honestly, I wanted to list everyone but there are well over 30 and I was too afraid to leave people out ❤︎

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